catch::some::asians

written by jason tung and kevin lee

helping yall dorks get on track......

the writers of this survey would like to state that all jokes made on this page are intended purely for fun.  we do not intend to offend anyone in any way.  if we named you specifically in our survey, we hope that you will laugh at it.  we assumed that we knew you well enough to crack a joke or two (for some, three or four.)  to the rest, if you get offended easily or if you cant take a joke, then please do not take this survey.  (lenny, we suggest you take this survey in a very good mood =) )

whats your name:

whats your email address:

whats your phone number:

1) how would you rate your physique?
body double for brad pitt/britney spears
do-able
not bad but nothing special
i wear sweats at the beach
i got more chins than a hong kong phonebook

2) what base have you reached?
first (*snicker*)
second
third
home run!!!
struck out (shake it off, lenny, shake it off)

3) if you were a simpson’s character, who would you be?
millhouse (quiet, studious)
bart (cool, outgoing)
marge (responsible, anal)
nelson (typical bad boy/girl)
apu (no comment....asians dont hate on "asians"....)

4) whats your idea of a good date?
moonlight walk on the beach
joking around all night
having a deep meaningful conversation
you and your date drinking at the 5 man
chatting with aZnCuTieaNgeLgRL3739....lolz

5) how involved are you at your college?
i never miss a council meeting
the parties are always in my room
i goto the big college events
i transferred to martel
i take my meals to my room

6) which do you most prefer to do on a friday night?
drinking around a keg
hanging out with friends in my room
catching up on homework
going off campus
enjoying the dinner i took to my room

7) what do you look for most in the opposite sex?
looks
personality

8) what club do you most associate yourself with?
chinese students association
campus crusade for christ
a club associated with my major
students association
south "asian" society  (j/k....much love....)

9) how would you rate your appearance?
damn fine
good for rice
average
below average
brown bag special

10) which word best describes your personality?
funny
nice
easy going
friendly
goofy

11) how important are looks to you?
i dont talk to ugly people
i count it as much as personality
i try not to judge people
i like people for who they are
yo mama ugly.

12) how assertive are you?
if i want it, i get it
i choose my times
i dont like to cause trouble
people use me a lot
im shyer than esther (just playing, girl =)....)

13) what kind of music do you like most?
pop (nsync, britney)
hip hop (ludacris, ja rule)
alternative (creed, u2)
asian (alex to, coco lee)
soft rock (elton john, phil collins)

14) what do you do on your free time?
sports
tv/video games
study
sleep
come up with stupid survey questions to help liven up csa

15) what movie best describes you and your friends?
slackers
wild things
revenge of the nerds
american pie
how stella got her groove back

16) what do you consider yourself to be?
conservative
moderate
liberal
not sure?!?!

17) if you were taking a date to dinner, where would you go?
mcdonalds ($5)
chilis ($10)
macaroni grill ($20)
tonys ($40 and up)
id take em to dinner and a movie....and when i say dinner, i mean sex....and when i say movie, i mean id film it....

18) around the opposite sex, i feel....
confident (asian puhlease, i know they like me....)
comfortable (im a pretty good catch)
nervous (why are they even talking to me?!?!
shy (i want my mommy....)
its alright, lenny, its alright....from now on, just start skipping these type of questions....

19) whats your favorite tv show?
friends (comedy)
e.r. (drama)
survivor (reality)
simpsons (cartoon)
sports center (hell yes.)

20) how often do you drink?
i have my own seat at the pub
socially with friends
once a month (and does your mommy hold your hand when you cross the street??)
never
i shoulda drank before nightlife....=)

21) whats your major?
enginerd
slackadem
english (thats a major?!?!)
my moms making me be a doctor
going for the seven-year university degree

22) i took this survey because....
i didnt know anyone on my hugs survey results
i only date asians
procrastinating from studying
im just desperate (hey, everyones got their down times, leonar....nah, we cant do it, threes too many)
im hoping to get matched up with lynn nguyen (j/k dale =)....)

***whoo, we got 2 guys on this one....bam BAM!!!***

23) whats most important to you in the future?
a good spouse
a good job
fame and fortune
a happy life
lynn nguyen (once again dale, our bad....)

24) whats your biggest turnoff?
immaturity (ladies, you like our jokes though, right??)
arrogance
aggressiveness
no ambition
ugly

25) which of these would make the best combination?
kevin/jason and a life
christina and her cyc counselor
the freshmen asian girls and ASIAN boyfriends
sean and ritalin
dale and a plane ticket

26) how do you feel about the college cheers?
i hate those four that got rid of them
i say my college cheer with pride
ill only say the clean cheers
they have bad words =(
yo mama still ugly.

27) which store do you typically shop at?
banana republic
express
old navy
marshalls
i love those free rice tshirts

28) you and your girl/boyfriend are in an argument. how do you react?
forget em. i dont need em.
if they come to me, ill listen.
ill give them a call after a few days.
id beg like a homeless person at mcdonalds
break up with them immediately (choose this one dale....juuuuust kidding....hahahaha....no, actually we re dead serious.)

29) csa awards:  (write-in)

best looking male

best looking female

funniest

coolest

best dressed

most likely to goto jail

most likely to be filthy rich

cutest freshman girl (christina wanted this category, not us)

30) what did you think of this survey?
it was great
it was pretty good
it was ok
it was not very good
it was terrible (go ahead and pick this one, lenny....we deserve it)

Thanks for taking the CSA Dating Survey.  Your results will be available at the next CSA Study Break!